ABH criminal still on the run

Theft has become a problem at Agnes Blackadder Hall.

Agnes Blackadder Hall has been stereotyped as quiet, harmless, and for better or worse, unimportant. But did anyone know the uncanny halls had a wild side? Or at least slightly wild …

Clothes from washing rooms have been disappearing. 

All sorts have gone missing, from underwear to jumpers, in the past few weeks. 

A long meeting was set up with the University discipline officer and security manager. Lynsey Martin, the hall manager, plans to introduce a swipe access to the laundry room to log all of those untrustworthy residents. Short term methods to reduce the problem include some disciplinary action from the wardens but nothing particularly preventive of the situation. 

The students of ABH voice their complaints. The stealing has gone “beyond a joke” and is “far from being funny”. Some of the stolen items include an expensive University team golf kit. A ruthless move on the villain’s part, as the number of people with the kit is limited.

While the culprit has not been found, one load of stolen washing has been returned since the problem originated at the start of term. With a bit of luck maybe another load will be returned within the coming months.

In the meantime, ABH students: Remember your hall spirit and work together to sort this ongoing problem. May all students at the University of St Andrew’s look out for someone who could be of any height, any gender and any age. As this doesn’t give a lot to go on with, please do not hesitate to contact the University staff if you find someone with an unnecessarily large amount of clothes in their room (and a University golf kit)!

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