Sports That Should Be Real Sports

When Quidditch just isn’t weird enough.

When I spoke to the President of the Athletic Union a couple of months back, he said that at our university there is a sports club for everyone. But let’s just say I have found some holes in the sports list that need some filling. So, Mr President, from the safety of behind a computer I challenge you to NOT find enough people to fill a team for these weird sports. Some of these could be the new rugby, if I’m ever bothered enough to actually form a team.

Octopush

Honestly, this should become an official Saints Sport just because of the name. How many sports have a pun for a name? It’s amazing! Octopush, also known as Underwater Hockey (boooo boring), is a sport where two teams try to push a weighted hockey puck into goals using hockey sticks and diving equipment such as flippers and snorkels. Sounds simple enough, except you have to do this while holding your breath for a reallllly long time. This is significantly less simple. So maybe this one isn’t for the unfit.

Ostrich Racing

This one you can play sitting down! Ostrich racing originated in Ancient Egypt and has become incredibly popular, actually, in many parts of the world, including the United States. Here, ostriches are raced like horses both bareback and on a chariot (like that needed explaining) But the most exciting bit? Ostriches are wild animals, so no one quite knows what they’ll do next.

Zorbing

What St Andrew’s student wouldn’t want to zorb on a Wednesday afternoon? Zorbing is essentially running around in a plastic orb, and can take place on a field, a hill, on water, or an obstacle course. So you’re basically a giant hamster. First trialled in New Zealand, turns out that trying to balance yourself while running inside a moving plastic ball is really popular across the world – especially in the UK. But why not bring it to St Andrews? Although there aren’t any “rules” to zorbing, making it not really a “sport,” you can’t say that it wouldn’t be funny to watch a drunk fresher attempt to roll from the sports centre to east sands. Worth forming a team just for that, tbh.

Bossaball

Probably the most awesome sport on our list, Bossaball is a Spanish sport that combines beach volleyball with every jumping castle ever. And latin music. And cool jumps. Played on a freaking inflatable volleyball court, this very new sport is insanely popular across countries like Spain, Brazil, Argentina, Singapore and Hungary to name a few. And why wouldn’t it be? Players can jump insanely high due to the inflatable court, and are able to kick, touch, hit and spike the ball over the net to the other side, all the while listening to Bossa Nova music thanks to an official “samba referee.” So please, St Andrews, if we’re going to introduce just one new sport to the AU, PLEAAAAAAAAASE let it be Bossaball.

Asking for a friend.

Comments

comments

851 thoughts on “Sports That Should Be Real Sports

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